Jealousy can be a silent killer – Guard your heart

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Lerato Mampa

Like debt, it is said that there is good and bad jealousy. Good jealousy can be
associated with protection of ones rights and possession while bad jealousy is
generally associated with being envious of someones achievements or perceived
advantages. It is said that jealousy can also refers to the thoughts or feelings of
insecurity, fear, and concern over a relative lack of possessions or safety. Good
jealousy can also turn to bad jealousy like in a possessive relationship where the
spouse is extremely jealous and doesn’t even allow the partner to converse with
opposite sex. There are many instances where spouses are even checking each
others phones to check all conversation because of feeling of mistrust, fear and
inadequacy which are often related to jealousy.

Jealousy is a thief and continually steal from the owner which is like cancer as it
has the potential to destroy everything if undetected. A jealous person will never
be able to live a peaceful life because he is provoked by success of others. He hates
it when people overcome their obstacles and barriers because he thinks that he is
the only person who deserves good things. The more people succeed, the more he
has chest pains (hurting). Sadly, he will always want to track the journey of others
and try as much as possible to criticise and nullify their success. It is not surprising
that Joyce Meyer in her book Seven Things that Steal Your Joy: Overcoming the
Obstacles to Your Happiness, she listed jealousy and envy as joy stealers. Many
years ago, our CEO bought a new car and while everyone was congratulating him,
one man did not even go out to see the car. He just peeped through the window,
shook his head and said, ‘I am not impressed, it is still below my car’. A jealous
person is always in unhealthy competition against others even without them
knowing. Jealousy makes you to always put yourself above everyone and you think
that by pulling others down, you are moving up even though you are going
nowhere.

Jealousy is the root of witchcraft and will destroy you instead of the people you
despise. They are continuing with their life while you cannot move because you
need to track their success to make sure that you have something nasty to say.
The constant checking of statuses is motivated by the need to know what is
happening in their lives and to find fault. Further, where they experience failures
and difficulties, you are the first to amplify the same for everyone to know and
become joyful. The jealous person becomes the carrier of the bad and nasty news.
Jealousy feed of evil and has shattered the lives and relationships of many
including spouses, siblings, neighbours, colleagues, and even fellow congregants. It
hits indiscriminately hence must be eliminated. Your words are poisonous because
the Bible said, for the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. Margaret Atwood
correctly said, You can only be jealous of someone who has something you think
that you ought to have yourself. It is difficult for a person who cannot congratulate
others to succeed, check you heart and find the root of your feelings when other
people succeed.

The way to deal with jealous is to concentrate on your journey and learn from
others without comparing yourself. Work hard on your dreams without comparing
yourself with others. Stop checking what other people on your streets are doing
because you will remain unfocused and directionless as you are distracted by what
others are doing. One neighbour bought a big SUV though he did not afford it and
was not planning to buy it but because the neighbour who was earning less than
him and with no tertiary qualification came home with SUV car one day, only to
learn after a month that it was company car. Competition is unhealthy as we are
gifted differently, and you must acknowledge that there would always be someone
better than you or worse than you.

If you are staying in a mud house, shack or sleeping in the kitchen, work hard and
aspire to be better without comparing yourself or being envious of those with big
houses. The motivation to build a better house should be your need of comfort
rather than being better than a neighbour. Buy and wear clothes that you need and
not because you want to be better than your friends. The type of car that you buy
must be a car fit for purpose and based on your affordability and not to send a
message that you have arrived. Don’t get in financial troubles to feed unsatisfied
and greedy appetite of jealousy. Don’t be a photocopy, God has created you as
original and enjoy your life. It is important to stay in your lane, if you have to
overtake, please check your surrounding lest you cause life accident.

 

Supplied by

John Mperekeng Teffo
PSA Labour Relations Manager

Write in his personal capacity

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